Page 5 - Behind The Smile - Spring 2016

know that God loved me and they would always love me.
As my boundary expanded to the bigger world, some of my peers treated me less than kindly. They made fun of the way I looked and talked. My Mom especially com- forted me by letting me cry and vent my hatred of cruel kids. But she did not condemn them. She acknowledged that she under- stood my feelings but did not add any hatred from herself to them. Nor did she excuse their actions. She let me know that she was sorry that this happened. I know now that her wisdom then in- stilled the beginnings of forgive- ness, and an understanding of others; that not everyone would see past my di erence to the real me. Then she would tell me the good things that she saw in me: “You have beautiful curly hair, you have a nice body, you are healthy, strong and athletic, you are smart.” She reminded me of the good friends I had and that they stood up for me when other kids where unkind.
And then, I got the opportunity to attend the 8-week summer pro- gram at LCPC in 1952, the year I graduated from high school. This came about because a school counselor told me that I could not pursue a career as a teacher. “You can’t do that. People will never understand your speech and no one will hire you.” In the school library that afternoon I read a magazine article about
LCPC and took it home for my parents to read.
The next thing I knew, we were on our way there. Thanks to a prosthetic speech dental appli- ance constructed especially for me at the Clinic, my speech was as good as anyone’s and in the fall I entered Miami University. Four years later I began my 29-year teaching career in Wyoming City Schools in Ohio.
ItwasonlywhenIsawhowa student teacher, Nancy, who had a badly burnt face interacted with children that I fully understood
“I know now that her wisdom then instilled the beginnings of forgiveness, and an understanding of others; that not everyone would see past my di erence to the real me.”
why my peers had made fun of me and hurt me. Nancy got the principal to explain to her class what had happened to her and then she willingly answered their questions. Nancy’s inner beauty, con dence in her abilities, and love of her students made her popular. Then I nally realized that my peers had treated me
so badly from fear and because they did not understand why I
looked and sounded as I did. The question “what happened to your face?” is an innocent question. No di erent than someone asking, “how did you break your arm?”
After retiring from teaching, I moved to Colorado and met Bill. It was as if we’d known each other all our lives. On a mesa looking across the valley to the West Elk Mountains, the two of us built the solar house he designed.
In closing, I o er to you the advice below, not as an “outsider” but as an “insider,” who has the same condition as your child. Above all, love your child and
be grateful for the gift he or she is. Look beyond their di erence (we are all di erent in some way) to their special uniqueness to help them nd their own unique talents and personality.
The patience, prayers and faith of my parents and the gifts of God are what ful lled my dreams and let me embrace my worth. So I pray that you too will have patience, faith, strength, wisdom and love for the precious child that has come to enrich your lives and, in turn, the lives of others.
Jean Hennen Paonia, CO February 3, 2016
Lancaster Cleft Palate Clinic ••• Behind the Smile eMagazine ••• Spring 2016 ___________________________ Page 5